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Single & happy The Gen-Now bachelorette brigade is in no hurry to tie the knot. She wants to take one step at a time
Nope, it’s not a profile straight out of Cosmo. Nor is it a success story featured in Femina. It’s the new breed of single women who watch those on the other side of the fence and smile. They’re single, independent and happy. But then, there’s another side to the story. Our single woman’s dad has just a year to go before he retires. Mom never misses a chance to mention that she was a mother of two at her age. The relative brigade of bhuas and chachis give sneering looks each time they drop by. And then, there is no end to the flurry of wedding invites of friends, cousins, acquaintances, ex-classmates et al. In the midst of all this, her opinion is unheard, unnoticed and unwelcome. “What’s the big deal if we haven’t walked down the aisle yet,” questions the bachelorette brigade. After all, they have their own reasons not to tie the knot till they feel it’s the right time. They have a plan charted out for life, and Mr Right is not top priority in their scheme of things. But it’s this very thinking that is brewing problems in their family, workplace and even the town. We peek into the minds of single women and figure out. Right to say ‘No’ Okay, this comes rather late, but now that we have the choice to say ‘No’, then why not exercise it? Gone are the days when you would be sporting a wedding band, the very day you were a graduate. Things have changed now, you have a right to hold and express your opinion. So why not take advantage of changing times? Just perfect A new relation should spell happiness and if one is happy the way life is moving then why look for a fresh beginning? An excellent job, a lifestyle of your choice, ample time for yourself, and much more. Why complicate things when all you wished for is right in front
of you? Dream or nightmare? Love or arranged, it will be your freedom that gets curbed. Right from waking up at six a.m. to opening the door for the maid, to missing an important meeting for your sis-in-law needs a shopping mate, to cancel an all girls night out for a family dinner, you’ll do it all. For, even if the business magazine ranks you CEO of the year, a certificate as the homemaker is most valued. Ms Know-all It’s often advised to look before you leap. And perhaps, ever since one can remember, men have been doing exactly that. Their reason for saying no to marriage has been simple — they have had their share of girlfriends and having been there and done that, they knew what it was going to be like. And today, the girl brigade, too, is not far behind — they have had their share of male attention, boyfriends, flirtations and live-ins. Believe it or not, the idea of marriage simply doesn’t appeal to them either. Superwoman Syndrome You don’t need a man’s shoulder to cry on. Chilled beer, a box of tissues, a dark chocolate bar and oodles of will power is the perfect solution. Strong and mature, these girls no longer look at the world through rose-tinted glasses. And, it’s time that men accept the fact that women are stronger than them any day, anytime. Ego trail When a woman takes on the role of man, where does the man fit? One of men’s biggest needs is to be admired and respected by the special woman in their life. And it is very hard to accept the fact that the woman’s skills and abilities exceed yours. So, the femme force has decided to make it easy for you and rather let you gloat in your glory. Blame game Countless bachelor jokes, flicks like Pyaar Ke Side Effect, songs like Joru ka Gulaam, why is it only the groom-to-be who is pictured
as the sufferer when it comes to marriage? Why are all the matrimonial ads woman-centric? Isn’t it
time for a change in outlook, after all it’s the girl who leaves behind her home, family, job and even her family name? Well, it’s not that the single woman is allergic to the ‘M’ word; it’s not even that she’s scared of it. Her life is already in place and she needs a reason to take a leap, to take a chance and move on. And she wants it her way, she wants to fall in love and not be made to fall in love. And why not? She’s earned it. After all, if her life’s already good, she has all reasons to look for a better half, who, indeed, spells
best. purva@tribunemail.com
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Cut above the rest
After fashioning a career for himself in dress designing by crafting the looks of Bollywood stars with his uniquely cut apparel, Vikram Phadnis’s designs now include the directing of a flick. The theme, plot, cast, and even the title, may still be under wraps, but one thing’s for sure — the designer-turned-director is looking for a good-looking girl to walk the ramp of popularity by acting in his film. The master craftsman, often referred to as Bollywood’s ace designer, is on the lookout. Rather, he has his starry eyes open for young talent. “I am yet to sign the cast. And, am not really particular about the city the girl belongs to. She can be from Mumbai, Delhi or even Chandigarh. Capacity to display flair before the arch-lights, and looks, is the only criterion,” he says. So all you good looking femmes willing to add some flair and bounce to your life, make sure you catch Phadnis’s searching-for-aptitude eyes. He is in the city for the DemiGods Fashion Show at Antidote-26. Just make sure you do not falter in your steps. For, he has the eyes of a choreographer. In fact, that’s exactly what he was before he designed his way to fame by fashioning garments of Salman Khan, Aishwarya Rai, Sushmita Sen, Priyanka Chopra, Bipasha Basu and Emraan Hashmi. In fact Celina Jaitley, John Abrahim and the ever-gorgeous Malaika Arora Khan swear by Phadnis’s collection. You may not know it but his bent has actually made so many twinkling stars shine in movies like Vaada, Mujhse Shaadi Karogi, Waqt, Lucky and Maine Pyaar Kyun Kiya. Oh yes, it was his talent you admired while appreciating the look of the actors in No Entry, Dus, Shaadi No 1, Deewane Huye Paagal and Salaam-e-Ishq. Well, it may take you by surprise but the youngster has never been to a fashion designing school. “I sometimes do feel the handicap, but now I have enough experience to overcome the huddles,” he asserts with a smile. “Just because I have never been to a fashion school, I will not say it’s useless to attend one. It has its own advantages. You will realise it as you go about cutting a niche for yourself in the fashion world.” After listening to him, you realise one thing. For adding panache to your life, you need determination and grit. Education and formal training’s good, but not must. You can actually do without it. So folks, listen to your heart and do stuff you are cut out for. All the best! saurabh@tribunemail.com
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Grace unlimited Ladette to Lady: A city-based grooming expert is holding a workshop for the brides-to-be
Diamonds may still be a gal’s best pal, but there’s no guarantee that their glitter will leave the men bedazzled. For that, la belle dames need to drop pearls of wisdom every now and then in their day-to-day conversation. And, no one can teach them the fine craft of exhibiting grace through words and gestures better than a grooming-school instructor. If she happens to be dexterous at making brides out of girls, or ladies out of simpletons, all the more better. So when an etiquette-cum-grooming expert like city-based Harleen Sekhon announces the holding of a special sprucing up workshop for the brides-to-be, the response has to be overwhelming. Sekhon runs an institute Grace—8 and has been conducting such sessions for the city crowd from time to time. Coming week, she will be holding a three-hour duration workshop for 10 prospective brides and that too absolutely free. Hurry up gals, the enrollment for the workshop to be held on Tuesday is on first-come-first-serve basis. If you miss hopping on the bandwagon to grace now, then you might have to pull out crisp currency notes from your wallet for it the next time. The course has been designed keeping in mind Indian traditions and culture; it is a blend of international and national protocol etiquette. It’s all about opening up, and at the same time learning the style of being confident, graceful, smart and well versed with the world around. Wondering why all this is so important? “Etiquettes and manners are worth scores of designer apparel and jewellery sets. For, no material assets can compete against the training that earns you admiration and respect at home and in the society,” says Sekhon. And when it comes to brides, it’s all the more imperative as they are about to tie the knot with a whole new world where husbands have to be kept in good cheer, and their standing in the society has to be maintained with utmost poise by rocking at parties. “Young women, by including a course in etiquettes in their marriage preparations, find themselves emboldened to manage their in-laws tactfully and to keep their newly-bond relatives in good spirits without deflating their egos,” says Sekhon. Well, you get to learn all about making your importance felt in a family, interaction with future in-laws, social etiquettes including the art of walking, sitting and even greeting. In dining manners, you get to learn restaurant etiquette, along with party and cocktail etiquettes. They even teach you the skills of answering telephone calls and making conversation. Also offered is a heady mixture of aperitifs, cocktails, mocktails, wines and spirits. Come on, gals! Try it! saurabh@tribunemail.com
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Free for all Is it true that anything that comes without a price tag is worth possessing? City residents believe so
All free things in life are good, apparently. No wonder, Chandigarhians seldom miss the opportunity of grasping freebies, tightfistedly and gladly. And if you think it’s an open statement, read about the Sunday morning incident. As bulldozers razed to the ground plant nurseries for carrying out ‘development work’ in Manimajra, the not-so-green residents took upon themselves the task of picking up the blossoms without pulling anything out of the pockets. Well, the stuff was not exactly free. But when confusion comes complimentary with government action, you can always feel free to take advantage of the situation, plant yourself at a strategic place, and carry home scooter and car full of stuff. After all, anything that comes your way at no cost is worth possessing. You should have seen the faces blooming as the residents ran away with the flowery loot. Some of them were not even plant lovers, but then ‘what’s the harm in grabbing the free for all stuff’? “If nothing else, I can always gift crotons to my friends,” says Panchkula-based businessman Pradeep Kumar. “I am sure they will appreciate my gesture.” Not a bad idea, considering the fact that there is no front lawn in Kumar’s Sector 4 house and his wife is strictly against the idea of nurturing potted plants. After all, plants only ‘attract mosquitoes’. Fellows, this is not the only instant. Go to one of the exhibitions organised so freely every now and then in the city and you will find the maximum crowd in front of the stalls offering perks. You may be a ‘milk-hater’. But when the guy behind the counter liberally offers you a sip of butterscotch flavoured milk in a plastic cup, the temptation is too hard to resist. This is not all. You may find it hard to absorb the fact if you are not a regular visitor to the exhibitions, but maximum rush will always be in front of shops offering digestive powers. For, they encourage you to come and taste the product. Just 10 per cent of the visitors, savouring the hospitality of the stall staff in Chandigarh, are eventually converted into customers. But that’s a reality even the sellers have learnt to live with. Another thing. Go to Sector 17 in the evenings. If you witness a huge crowd in front of a showroom, be sure it’s either Dhoni tackling Monty Panesar in a test match. Or else, a shopkeeper is offering giveaways to the customers. The craze for hand-outs can also be gauged from the fact that frenzy breaks lose at the venue if a singer is giving an open performance in the city. Allow entry strictly through donor passes and you have so many people calling you up constantly to know if you can arrange for complimentary passes. And when there is a cricket match at the Punjab Cricket Association stadium, be sure it’s a headache for you at no extra cost. For, even some of the top businessmen do not believe in paying for good things in life. That’s the way it is.
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The Number Game A Ludhiana man may have purchased a mobile number for Rs 15 lakh, but city residents are not far behindNot long ago, mobile sets were a reflection of your opulent lifestyle. If you had an expensive one, you were known to be smart among your pals. But with luxurious and high-tech sets practically coming a dime a dozen, premium mobile numbers are the new status symbols and have made it to the most sought-after list. That service providers are auctioning mobile numbers is testimony to this. Well, it may not exactly sound music to your ears, but the fact is that the youngsters are spending huge amounts for getting these numbers. The hammer went down this Thursday, after a Ludhiana resident offered as much as Rs 15.50 lakh for unique number — 9780000000. The mobile operators assert that they resort to the process of auction when multiple subscribers demand one number. Otherwise, the premium numbers come with fixed price tags. Depending upon the popularity of the number, you may have to pay anywhere between Rs 2,500 and Rs 10,000. Elaborating upon the classification of numbers, an employee of a telecom company chips in, “The numbers are divided into five categories namely Penta, Hexa, Gold, Super Gold and Silver. In the Penta category, last five digits are the same. Similarly, in Hexa category, the last six digits are the same.” The employee says mobile numbers with digits that repeat themselves are the latest scream. Quoting an example, the employee says people prefer numbers like 94820-94820. They are also going in for numbers like 007, 143 and 786 to match their date of birth, car or bike numbers. The fact that more and more people are nowadays willing to change their mobile numbers has also encouraged the concept. In fact, some of the subscribers change their mobile numbers as often as they replace their sets in an attempt to get hold of something better. Good, but who are the buyers and how do they explain spending huge amounts on the numbers. Well, they are mostly businessmen and youngsters. And just like good clothes and cars, they do not hesitate in calling up style by buying good numbers. “If you wear branded clothes, drive a luxury car and using a high-tech mobile, then why can’t you go in for a unique mobile number that suits your personality” says Gaurav Johri, a local young businessman. Johri says he spent as much as Rs 10,000 to buy golden numbers. “My mobile number now contains four ones in a row. It also matches my factory address and my car’s registration number. It’s easier to remember and makes me feel real proud.” Guys, there is drawback also. You keep on getting crank calls from guys who believe in dialing ‘convenient numbers at random.’ lifestyletribune@gmail.com
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Flicks in local flavour Sreedhara Bhasin I always thought it was odd that for watching a movie in Chandigarh, one has to go to a multiplex in Haryana. That seemed to be the norm and the reason for that was discernible when one tried to find the independent movie theatres here. I was raised in a metro where ‘cinema halls’ dominated people’s entertainment. The independent halls came decked with red velvet ruffled curtains covering the screen and exquisite woodwork adorning the frames. There were many classes of halls – ‘plush’ halls and ‘mediocre’ halls, ‘western’ halls and ‘indigenous’ halls, ‘blockbuster’ halls and ‘matinee’ halls – but, all of them were functional and popular and in plenty. Chandigarh seemed to be bereft of such theatres. The very few halls that were still standing seemed neglected and abandoned. Some donned a frightening exterior. Some virtually did no business. The culture of cinema halls seemed to have been extinct in this city. I did enquire about these halls. Most people were vociferous in their condemnation of these older theatres. Some said the heat was insufferable for air conditioning never works, some said there are bedbugs in the seats and one must wear thick clothes in order to venture in. Some even said that I would see rats playing hide and seek at my feet. Encouraged by so many in such vivid terms, I desisted from venturing into these theatres altogether. This streak was however broken by the recent tussle over Harry Potter’s newest movie. In utter desperation, my daughter and I decided to explore a new territory –a local cinema hall. My cousin joined the ranks, leading to greater reinforcement. The three of us set out one evening -riddled with deep qualms – feeling like to-be martyrs. My daughter however made a very salient observation. The option of walking out was still with us. Thus fortified by her wisdom, we got to the theatre and were much relieved to see that there were lots of other folks like us waiting at the lobby. Nobody was wearing a lungi (not that I would admit to having anything against lungi) and nobody was brandishing a bottle (except Bisleri). In fact, buying tickets from the traditional looking ticket counter (where you speak through a hole in a glass pane) brought back happy memories. The hall was nicely cool and air-conditioned. Despite my 20/20 vision, I could not detect a single rodent. Despite, wearing open sandals, nothing bit me. We enjoyed an entire show, unscathed, with no threat of asphyxiation, assault or epidemic. Maybe, I would start frequenting these halls. They sure need the revenue for a much-needed paint job!
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Write to Renee I am a 29-year-old girl from a small town and married to this guy from a big city. Since we got married, my husband has labeled me as a small-town girl and makes fun of me in front of all his friends, particularly his girl friends. He wants me to dress a certain way and smoke and drink with them. I am educated and had a good upbringing. But I do not know how to deal with this. When I refuse to obey him, we end up fighting. What do I do? Amita Menen My heart goes out to you. What a trap to be caught up in! The size of a town has nothing to do with one’s personality. Tell him it is the attitude which is important. Keep an open mind. As far as his friends are concerned, if you come across as a happy and well-adjusted person, I’m sure they will appreciate and respect you. Partying can be fun if you don’t allow others to get to you. Stand by your values. Try to win him over with your goodness. It works. I am a 34-year-old married man with two kids. Just a few weeks ago, I discovered that my wife has been seeing another guy. I am disturbed but I also feel that I have been neglecting her and my kids for a long time. Should I confront her or should I just let is pass? She is a working woman. Should I track her? Raman Ahuja How have you created this emotional mess for yourself! As you are accepting that you have been neglecting your wife and family, sure enough you have been asking for trouble. Maybe your wife has an innocent relationship with another man. Confronting her would definitely be inappropriate. I feel you should take her out for a nice dinner and then have a chat with her regarding her friend in an amicable manner. Weigh the pros and cons of the situation and then decide to deal with it accordingly. Seeing a counselor together would also be a good idea as she could guide you in the right direction. Handle the situation with maturity and do not allow your guilt of having neglected her cloud your decisions. I am a 32-year-old woman, married for the past 12 years. Lately I have started feeling suffocated in my marriage. We both work and decided not to have children. Now I am wondering if that was a wise decision. Sometimes I think of having an affair but the idea of stepping out of the safety of my marriage does not appeal to me. Why am I so unhappy? Navneet Sidhu Life is about growing and evolving. We all are constantly in the midst of something or the other in our lives. How we deal with it, depends on our attitudes and perceptions. I don’t think the problem lies in your relationship. You have to be clear with the idea that your life begins with you. You cannot be looking for Mr Right to solve your problems. You need a change of scenario for a while. Take a holiday with friends or family. You are still young enough to have kids. Having an affair is no solution. Learn to love yourself and learn to live a meaningful life. Happiness will come naturally.
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It’s a game of brawn vs brain Rajiv Kaplish Die Hard 4.0 Hollywood hunk Bruce Willis is back with a bang. Aeons after cleansing the mean streets of New York of all that is bad and evil, the American dream factory’s fastest fighting machine stages a spectacular comeback amidst blazing action in Die Hard 4.0. The daredevil cop, John Mclaine (Bruce Willis) has the onerous task of bringing to justice a computer geek, Thomas Gabriel (Olyphant), who is hell-bent on unleashing a ‘virtual attack’ on the country by hacking the entire system. Trains can’t run, planes can’t fly. There is no water and power and Wall Street has come to a halt. The sinister world of Gabriel is seething with revenge. Instead of addressing his concerns of ‘virtual terrorism’ as a potential threat, the nation pooh poohed his apprehensions. It should now pay the price for its folly. His gauntlet to Mclaine, who is not computer-savvy, is loud and clear—you may be a hotshot on your turf, but this is my territory. Not to be cowed down by the techno-terrorist, Mclaine seeks the help of a hacker, Matt Farrell (Justin Long) to foil the former’s nefarious designs. As the worlds of Gabriel and Mclaine collide, celluloid turns into a battleground wherein bridges are destroyed by missiles and helicopters are brought down. In the hands of a lesser hero, the action genre gets reduced to a cacophony of squeaks and rattles. When Bruce Willis dabbles in it, it gets a new definition. Mr Muscles puts you right there—smack bang in the middle of a mind-blowing action extravaganza. The story, which is an apology for a story, will be frowned upon by the arty-intellectual crowd. But bloodshed fans are bound to savour it in a big way. Showing at: Neelam
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Bhojpuri Badshah
All channels are now trying to break away from saas-bahu sagas and are involved in a desperate search for an alternative genre. It is important to know that viewers are open to watching stuff beyond family dramas. — Dharam Pal
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Kaafila becomes the first film in the history of Indian cinema to get a simultaneous Indo-Pak release. With a High Court ruling in Pakistan enabling full clearance for the film, more than 20 trailers are on air in the theatres in Pakistan. Says the film’s writer-director Ammtoje Mann, “We are very happy that Kaafila, based on human trafficking—a global concern today—is being screened in India, Pakistan and the world over at the same time. Kaafila is written and directed by Ammtoje Mann, who also stars in the film besides Sunny Deol, Sana Nawaz, Mona Lisa and Polina Stoyanova among others. — Dharam Pal
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It seems that Sienna Miller and Jessica Biel’s mutual love for dogs is making them quite compatible. The actresses are set to star together in the big screen adaptation of Oscar Wilde’s play—A Woman Of No Importance’— alongside Sean Bean. And, sources claim that the two struck an instant rapport on the sets of the movie. Jessica, famously linked to the animal charity PETA, talked continuously about her pooch, while Sienna gushed about her pet dogs Porgy and Bess. “Jessica was telling Sienna about the animal charities she is involved with and asking whether Sienna wanted to get in touch with them,” the Daily express quoted a source, as saying. — ANI
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Alternate hot/cold water application brings feeling of freshness as these washes away waste products and metabolites and enhances oxygen supply to fatigued muscles. — Dr Ravinder Chadha
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A glossy degree. A well-heeled job. An independent flat. A swanky car to drive around. Enviable vital stats of 36-26-36. A fine hand in tossing up a multi-cuisine meal. A fulfilled wishlist of holidays with girlfriends. A male fan following getting larger by the day. A tag of being good with kids in the neighbourhood. A suitably entertained agony aunt for married friends spinning tales about in-laws.
He shot to popularity as the highest-paid participant in Bigg Boss. And soon the Amitabh Bachahan of Bhojpuri cinema, Ravi Kishan became a household name with his charming personality and different vocabulary. Kishan has also starred in several Hindi flicks like Aan — Men At Work, Tere Naam, Phir Hera Pheri, and most recently, 1971. He played a movie jockey to the premiere of his film Ganga. Keeping him busy at present is Filmy’s reality show — Bathroom Singer, where he will be one of the non-singer jury members.
