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What do women of style and substance have to say about the inhuman practice of female foeticide that is so rampant in our society today? Why is the jet set not more vocal? Anandita Gupta finds out why by talking to some of them
She’ virtually floats alone in a strange, alien world—piercing darkness, agonising solitude and simmering silence. But then, there’s something more painful than all these pre-natal discomforts, and that’s the pain of rejection. Yes, for the first ever signals this developing foetus gets are that of some angry voices erupting, “What? It’s a girl? No, we don’t want it.” So even before she’s stepped into this world, shadows of death are already etched out on the walls of her house—her mother’s womb! That’s how a majority of North Indian families react to the news of a girl child’s arrival. What if she’d grow up to put on her walking shoes and match daddy’s footsteps, stride by stride, to lead him one day? What if she’d have grown up to be India’s richest self-made businesswoman (remember Kiran Mazumdar Shaw and Indira Nooyi)? The whats and ifs are smeared in the mud of the monstrous desire for a male child. And all she’s reduced to is a piece of silent, helpless ruin. Heart of the matter Newspapers may be flooded with touching reports about female foeticide. NGO’s and political parties may be crying hoarse to weed away the seed of this crime from our social fabric. But are we sensitised enough to respond? We sneak peaked into the hearts of some successful city women to find out how they feel about the crime. Meet 24-year-old Jaspreet Kaur—the legal eagle whose flight has been unfettered by the conventional clamps on women. No, her client roster doesn’t boast of the beefiest corporate clients. In fact, being a third Semester student, she hasn’t fought her first case yet. Nonetheless she’s tirelessly toiling to tread on her own track—anchoring, theatre and debates. “I believe young girls are not doing enough to fight female foeticide. Students are ready to fight till death when it comes to issues like reservation. But most girls think female foeticide’s happening only in uneducated, poor families and this can never happen to their child. Its only after they get married in rich, influential and so-called educated families that they realise they are doing it too.” Conspiracy of silence Niyati Chitkara, Principal, Chitkara International School, clarifies “We need to distinguish between value-based education and just literacy. No amount of bans put on the crime can stop it unless people are sensitised about the inhumanity of it. What we women can do is launch an anti-dowry campaign, as the fear of dowry is a major cause of female foeticide. But why’s the city’s jet set not doing anything about the issue?” “I think the media needs to play a greater role here. Issues like AIDS and Environment abuse are made to seem grave, but female foeticide is merely reported,” laments Niyati. Adds USA-based Nisha Diddi, an Education Diagnostician, “Most of us think that foeticide is happening only in the rural areas to poor women. But many educated, rich urban families are doing it under cover too. So, there’s a need to change our attitude towards perceiving this problem, only then will we rise to tackle it. Empower women Chips in the sixteen-year-old Surina Diddi, “As women, we should spread education and awareness in women first. Women need to be placed in a situation where they can take their own decisions. If would-be-moms say no to sex determination, can it actually happen?” voices the young lady settled in the States who’s been teaching slum kids at sector 25, whenever she visits India. Suneet Singh, Marketing Head Ebony, says “Yes, we do feel angry reading reports on female infanticide. But there are no associations and mediums through which we can express it.” Or maybe, caught in the whirlwind of our hectic lives, we’ve stopped emphathising with larger humanity. “Not really. In fact I feel media has to play a significant role here. Why not highlight things like Sushmita Sen adopting a girl child? Why not publish first-person accounts of women who refused to abort their girl child?” Ultimately, it rests upon the shoulders of the media, socialites, students and NGO’s to get together and take up the matter before its too late. Otherwise the unborn daughters will continue to die silent deaths, their souls singing what Amrita Pritam once wrote, I am ill fated—the daughter of Punjab
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Designing woman
Designing is what comes from your own passion and creation,” says Sohi, a city-based designer. She likes to accept challenges and experiment along the way. With a gifted hand, she is able to bring the abstract designs alive. Nina Sohi, a city girl who did a fashion-designing course from Singapore, says: “I am seeing my dreams being accomplished while I am flying on the viewless wings of risks.” The bubbly Sohi’s exhibition in Mountview on August 26 and 27 includes her latest collection of saris, suits and westerns. Her designs attract the young and the old. “The designing has been done keeping everybody in mind,” Sohi says. Though she has used all kinds of fabrics but georgette, chiffon and crepes are her favourites as they have a good fall, which make one look pretty. Her designed saris stand with a difference. She has introduced 3-D affect on the blouses. The flexible rolling plastic like flower is 3-D. “I have designed the saris keeping all ages in mind,” reveals Sohi. The lightweight sequined saris are fascinating. Pakistani mukaish and dori is also used to add to the attraction. She has an attractive array of suits embedded with stones, threads and many other things. Proper attention is given to dupattas also. “Proper cuts are given in a way which should fix comfortably according to one’s size and one should look elegant” says Sohi. Nina Sohi also designs lots of attractive western dresses. Mexican skirts with full ten meters of cloth are appealing. Beautiful tops and shirts are very neatly designed. The garments are expensive and the minimum price for even a top designed by her is Rs 5000.
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Life at sea came alive at the glittering dinner of the Chandigarh Merchant Navy Officers Association held at the Golf Course on Friday night. The fresh team of office bearers of the association hosted the dinner. Sponsored by the Centurion Bank of Punjab, the event saw a big gathering of officers, their wives and children. Sailing stories were exchanged as the officers mingled with each other, some of them meeting each other after years. “These meets are really important. Since merchant navy officers are sailing for a good part of the year we end up missing many such occasions. As a result when we do meet it is after a long time,” said Captain Jaspal Singh Anand of Marlow Navigation India ltd, the new president of the association. “It’s heartening to see many wives, whose husbands were sailing, but, who made the effort to come and meet friends,” added Komal Anand who played the perfect hostess and ensured everyone was taken care of and the kids too were not ignored. The new officer bearers of the association include Navneet Bakshi who is the Vice President, Captain Rohit Shridhar the Secretary and Viranchi Kaushik, Treasurer. “We are planning many more such dinners and we would also be starting an activity unit of the officers’ wives. We are looking forward to more active participation of the wives since they are on shore and can contribute much more,” said Captain Anand. Captain Rajesh Sakhuja, who has written a stirring novel,” Riptide”, was present, personally autographing copies for friends. Mr Atma, the regional head, represented the Centurion Bank. — TNS
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The Write Approach
God gave us sound but shabd (word) is created by man. Style in the form of drama, poetry and narratives are creative expressions, whimsical and changing but the basic requirement remains the same,” articulated Dr Naresh, Chairman of the Chandigarh Sahitya Akademi, at the inauguration of their third creative writing workshop for school children held today at the State Library Building, Sector 34. The workshop touched upon poetry, drama, articles and short stories through the city’s eminent writers and poets like Dr Dinesh Chamola, Professor Pali Bhupinder Singh, Upendra Bhatnagar and Anubhav Naresh respectively. Addressing a full-house of 80 students from 20 different schools in Chandigarh, Mohali and Panchkula, Dr Naresh opening communiqué was full of breezy anecdotes and earnest direction. “When I was a child, my father used to say I do not have three children I have two because the third one has become a poet.” He said writing is a path towards a more responsible, more creative, more aware community and young people should strive towards it. He stressed on the need for these workshops because, “it is the sacred duty of my generation to pass on whatever we have learnt,” but asked the children to be ready to receive this knowledge fully and purely, “because the path is long.” Going further, poet, Dinesh Chamola said there was no age or limit to writing and it is the sincerity which matters. “Writers are like saints. They are not afraid and write from the heart. Along with soldiers who defend our borders, they are pillars of progress fighting for society.” Professor Bhupinder expressed great hope for the future of the written word when he saw the numbers that had gathered. Having been a part of the theatre world for over 20 years he said the essence of writing was not ‘what’ but ‘why’. “You learn to see and interpret life and you get the right perspective through literature. Being literate and creative is being rich, not monetarily perhaps but certainly spiritually.” Upendra Bhatnagar, senior journalist, spoke of the necessity to keep the inner eye open and welcome experiences with open arms. “Articles are different from stories,” he said elaborating on his area of expertise. “A good feature is one where the writer’s empathy with his subject is reflected.” He said feature writing should follow a lucid format for any story would come alive, “Little details about the place you have visited, simple language, enthusiasm for what you write along with a flow in narration and a strong beginning, body and an end.” Even Anubhav Naresh who elucidated on story writing techniques emphasised on the need to be specific to create a readership. For the young eager beavers it was the chance to hone in on their skills and become better readers, writers and perhaps great citizens of the country. And they all had their personal preferences. While William Wordsworth’s poems moved Deepali, for 13-year-old Kashish, it is the dream of becoming a playwright. Yachna (12), a budding poet in the making and writing verse in English on ‘loneliness’ looks up to the renown of Rabindra Nath Tagore while Neha displaying enchanting confidence said she was sure she could excel in anything she took up but story writing challenges her. Here’s to a generation that is gearing up to change mindsets.
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FUN WITH FASHION
Sparkling Diversity Splash of bright tropical colors – subtle pinks, breezy greens, soulful blues, sunshine oranges juxtaposed against paisley prints to caress the bridal outfits on display. In fact, a dip in paisley, which is the most romantic pick of this season was offered by designer Ruchika Modi in her bridal collection. Sheer Fabrics Forget chunky lehengas and blood red saris that brides so gleefully wore a couple of years back. The collection at Kidar’s seems a tribute to the modern woman, who believes in experimenting with sheer fabrics and lurex shimmers. On offer were Tulle saris with lace underskirts, linen summer dresses, paper orange lehengas, printed chiffons, tanchuis (for the traditional lot) and zip backless blouses. The blouses were in fact neatly cut and trendily worked upon to suit the modern woman who believes in being shaped up. So all you young ladies with ice ring smooth backs and a taste for subtlety this was a scoop of eye candy for you.
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MATKA CHOWK While doing research for a project, I stumbled onto a web page full of proverbs. As I idly started reading those, the realisation dawned upon me that I could possibly delve into the exercise of trying to see how many of these would apply to the ways of our beautiful city. Don’t cross your bridges before you get to them: Don’t worry about future problems before you need to. We would definitely fall into this category. Just watch the chowks on a rainy day. The entire circle is jammed by people who have inched up every conceivable gap to advance their way and in the process have blocked all maneuverable space. Why worry about the full circle, when you are only at the half-circle? Time and tide wait for no man: This one is quite apt. Sometimes, while driving, I feel that the driver behind me must be getting to an emergency room, or catching a train which leaves in the next few seconds, or maybe, exercising the motions of a barbaric ‘push and conquer’ therapy. Judging from the way people conduct themselves, they must be very mindful of this proverb, while returning library books, filling air for tyres, dropping children at school, looking for parking and even crossing the road! A lie well stuck to is as good as the truth: I can vouch for this one, for I have called the telephone/mobile companies innumerable times to complain about bills not being delivered to my office address. Once, the representative told me that the courier boy has reported that my office refused to accept the bill, for I did not work there. On stating vehemently that I do indeed work there and that the boy must have tried to deliver it to a wrong office, I was told that their report as entered in the database was that I did not work in the office the courier went to and hence, that is the truth. What can I say! All good things come to an end: I feel dismayed when I see all the advertisements for real estate in the newspaper these days. High-rises, mega shopping malls and complexes are in the offing. For me, who comes from a city that lost its virtues to vertical rise of structures and over-population, it bears a portent. All the good things we have in our beautiful city – wide open spaces, flowering gardens, avenues of lush, green trees – can we hold onto these in the face of impending growth and so called ‘progress’?
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AUDIO BASICS Friends, before we take that very first step and get into the exciting world of sound, digital mixing, editing, SFX and other technical jargon, it is pertinent for us to first have an understanding of the fundamentals of audio. Every sound consists of rapid variations in air pressure (or any other medium that conducts sound). Anything that makes sound; guitar strings, drum heads, vocal chords etc., do so by vibrating back and forth. Vibrating surfaces push air molecules back and forth, creating positive and negative changes in air pressure. These changes in air pressure are called sound waves. These waves travel through space via the compression of air molecules and upon reaching our ears; the waves are introduced to our aural receptors as vibrations. The brain then interprets these signals as sound. Pitch is determined by the frequency of the sound, or the number of cycles per second measured in Hertz (Hz). One cycle is made up of both the positive and negative part of the wave. The more frequent the cycles - faster the vibration, the higher the pitch; the less frequent the cycles - slower the vibration, the lower the pitch. In general, we can hear a frequency range from 20 to 20,000 Hz. While, Volume is determined by the height of the wave, or amplitude typically measured by ratios in decibels (dB). The higher the amplitude, the louder the sound; the lower the amplitude, the quieter the sound. There are different types of decibels, each with its ratio based on a different reference. The shape of the wave determines the Timbre or quality of the sound. This is what makes a flute sound different than a trombone, even if they are playing with the same amplitude and frequency. Microphones and instrument pickups typically act as the ears of our audio recording system, converting sound waves into an electrical signal. This electrical signal can then be amplified, recorded and even modified using various audio equipment. Speakers act as the sound source of our recording system, converting an electrical signal into sound waves and the amount of reverberation depends on the relative amount of sound reflection and absorption in the room. Now comes the most important part of any radio show and that is the all-important editing. Editing for radio is to prepare a program or piece by starting with raw sound elements and obtaining a finished product, ready for broadcast. It is to take raw elements, treat them and end up with an ear pleasing product. It can be thought of as cutting and sewing different pieces of sound together. And if you are an expert in this field which you will be, but only after proper training, then the rewarding world of sound beckons you. (The writer is a renowned Radio Personality running Radio Buzz and The Take-One Academy of Broadcasting, a Radio Jockey trainer, voice expert and an international broadcaster)
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WRITE TO RENEE Dear Renee, I am a smart and intelligent man in my 30’s and I am an art professor in a reputed college. My problem is that every time I begin to feel that I am really happy in a job situation, I find someone who is my senior trying their level best to show me down or throw me from my job situation. I feel people are resentful or jealous of me as I am very popular with my fellow students. This is not my first job, I have changed many jobs and each time I am thwarted and somehow made to leave due to unpleasant circumstances. Last time someone went to the administration to make me leave. Do you think I am doing something wrong? Why do I always attract this scenario and allow it to happen every time? Pritam Ahluwalia Young man, you are not wrong in any way, it is just that this is your own pattern. It is perhaps a family pattern you are carrying into your professional life. We are all products of our childhood environment. As a child perhaps some member of your family was treating you harshly, your father or your elder brother may be, so you feel your seniors are after you and therefore you allow them to treat you the way you were treated as an child on a subconscious level. Please look within yourself. Discover your pattern, find out who is the person who is still pulling your strings, allow them to let go of you mentally. Only when you are free of this subconscious situation will you be able to correct your life. Please do not play the blame game. It is never the other person at fault. Do not blame yourself either. Sort it out within you and then move on with respect. The Universe will definitely bless you with love and help you to correct your life. Dear Renee, I am a young women of 28 years with to a life which is probably a source of envy for most of my friends and colleagues yet between work, a nice charming boyfriend plenty of work related travel, I feel totally stressed. I am a third child among sibling and pressurized to perform and make it. I was always very strong headed. I always thought the day I reached there would be the happiest. But now that I have everything I desired I feel “Where is the joy”. I am sensible, grown up, very organised, doing all the right things and yet even when I party I find something missing always – why is this happening to me. Now that I have it all going according to the whole world, I seem to feel absolutely lonely and miserable somewhere with. Reema Sanghera Having dreams and desires is very important, arriving there is better still and yet being in touch with your inner-self is the most important part of being human. Experiencing pleasure and satisfaction is the fundamental requirement of a human being. Living that feeling through is an art you have to learn. Remember the whole worlds standards of happiness can never be yours. You are unique in yourself as a person, learn to know and accept that and enjoy it. You have probably pushed yourself to hard to arrive. That is why the joy in your achievement is not there. You need to rid yourself of the emotional stress you are living under, just take a good holiday with some friends, unwind, don’t push yourself. Stop thinking about the world for once, sense what makes you happy and go for it. Your life is your and don’t allow others to colour it. Be in charge the joy will return. Rush in your queries to Renee at lifestyle@tribunemail.com or care of Lifestyle, The Tribune, Sector 29-C, Chandigarh
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True a city never sleeps to get tired of those haute couture Expos, be it any season. But recently, like it happens every year, Expos are getting drenched in some deep rich hues–to colors of celebration. And why not for the wedding season is almost here. No wonder the city shelves seem brimming with sensuality and spunk. But how are today’s bridal collections hipper than the last year’s? We sneak peaked at the recent two day expo held at the Kidar”s Gallery to scoop out the hottest bridal trends.