This refers to V.K. Kapoor’s "Survive stress to sustain marriage" (March 22). Gender equality, on which all healthy man-woman relations should be based, can neither be measured in material terms nor can it be ensured just by the male partner. It is a psycho-social experience, nurtured and enjoyed mutually by both man and woman. The problem with our social set-up is that the so-called liberated women nurse very high and unrealistic expectations from their partners, without pay heed to harsh realities.

A sympathetic mutual understanding and a natural sense of cooperation, where one’s personal ego has no place, are the key factors to a stress-free and happy married life.

Extra-marital affairs

Apropos of the write-up, "Who doesn’t like a bit on the side?" (March 1). Marriage is an institution where one hopes to find love in a socially acceptable way. However, expecting married life to be smooth sailing is a bit too much to ask for. Extra-marital affairs continue to serve as an outlet for the failures and frustrations of married life. When a partner is constantly nagged and criticised for every word or deed, it is natural for him or her to slip away to a place where he or she is warmly received. Extra-marital affairs don’t necessarily imply physical relations. These may include a sharing of personal problems, likes or dislikes etc. It should be remembered that when a husband sins, the wife is never innocent, and vice versa.

This refers to "Why deny ourselves sensual pleasures?" by Khushwant Singh (March 15). It is, indeed, senseless to deny oneself pleasures on religious grounds. Ananda, or spiritual ecstasy, is different from sensual pleasures. One may say it is of better quality than the latter, but the importance of the latter cannot be denied. Pleasures can be denied to oneself only on grounds of health or their impact on the sensibilities of the society.