Protima felt that Indian culture was worth preserving, and that we should support those who were working towards this goal,
recalls Harkiran Sodhi

She danced her way to the gods

PROTIMA was not a mere person, she was a phenomenon. She projected a powerful presence across any podium. The original Indian "flower child," she was photographed as a model, written about as Kabir Bedi’s wife and her name whispered around for that incident on Bombay’s Juhu beach...

In the last few decades, she had redefined herself as a dedicated dancer, and given India its ‘dance village’, Nrityagram, though only a short while ago she suffered that tragedy of losing her son.

As a child Protima was shy, introverted and full of hang-ups. In one of her interviews with this writer, Protima revealed that she grew up with a terrible complex that no one was going to marry her as she felt she was very ugly. The woman who was to eventually marry the dashing and handsome Kabir Bedi would pray to God that anyone, no matter what he looked like or did, should marry her, just so that she could produce six-eight kids and keep her home. "I had no ambitions, no plans and could never ever dream that any man would fall in love with me," Protima said.

As a student, despite the fact that she always stood first or second, never third, she was expelled from three or four schools. "Just for being creative, I used to draw cartoons of the nuns. You know they were great sketches and if I had been encouraged I could have been a great painter or an artist..." One can still picture the wry smile that played around her lips as she said this.

College followed and the "ugly duckling" turned into a beautiful model, who, as she stated candidly, couldn’t get over the fact that boys were whistling at her. "I used to look back to see who they were whistling at and couldn’t believe it was me. I would often smile at them, I was so thrilled! And that was taken as a very forward thing to do".

This, of course, ensured that she got herself a "reputation". Suddenly, with the contours changing, I became a very attractive young woman who attracted just by being there." Protima did not finish her college, though she kept taking the money for the fees and books from her father.

Some people are born great; some have greatness thrust upon them and some just "stumble" into great things. "I stumbled into modelling; then I stumbled on to Kabir Bedi, for whom I left and ran away from home when I was 19. I stumbled on to pregnancy. I didn’t mean to be pregnant; and then I stumbled on to dance," said Protima.

How? At the age of 26, Protima, a mother of two, saw an Odissi dance recital by sheer accident. She had not even heard of Odissi, but found it so enthralling that she knew she had to learn it.

"I walked into the wrong theatre. I was going to see a rock concert when I walked into this theatre where these girls were dancing. I did not know what the dance was. All I knew was that this was what I was born for and had to learn." She went up to the guru, Kelucharn Mahapatra, in her jeans and wild, dyed hair and told him she had to learn this dance.

"He looked at me and said: "Whom have you learnt from?’ I told him: "If I had learnt, then why would I ask you?" He told me I was too old to learn now and refused to teach me. I don’t take a no for an answer. "I changed; I dyed my hair black, oiled them, put on a sari and sat down. He had to teach me".

Protima trained on and off (as she had two children to look after) for 10 years but within three years she had started performing. The normal training period most people go through is 15-18 years before they give stage performances. The basic difference being that as a child you learn twice a week for about two hours, and Protima as an adult, give far more time and undivided attention to dance, thereby cramming in the brief period what most people take half a lifetime to achieve.

She danced for 12-15 hours every single day and it was a concentrated effort with no distractions. So in three months she had logged in more hours of dance time than people do in 10 years.

Protima lived in Europe for four years and it was during this period that a realisation came to her. "Living abroad one keeps missing the fabric, the texture, and the mythology, everything that makes India. The village and the spirituality, even if you don’t find it if you are living here. Then I realised that it all had to do with my culture, the culture of the country and then I realised what my dance meant to me. I was explaining it in my dance, I was giving lectures," she recalled.

One can still remember the passion with which she said: "We are all very proud of our culture, but just by being proud we are not supporting it. This is something that has been handed down to us—our poetry, literature, dance and music. These have come to us through a line of dedicated people who have given their lives to preserving and transmitting their learning. And this needs to be supported, especially in this fast changing world of today.

"We have infiltrators coming through the air into our drawing rooms, through the television. We can see our children changing... we have seen what has happened to America — the alienation — and we don’t want that to happen.

"Of course there is a lot of crap in our culture too, which ought to go, but the fine things like the dance, music, poetry and literature, they ought to be supported on a war-footing. Not only preserved, but promoted in a package that is appealing to the young people. You need awareness and only by understanding can appreciation take place".

"Our generation’s duty is preservation, as, otherwise our children and theirs after that would have lost it forever. The onus is now on us. If you think our culture is worth preserving, then go out and actively support people who are working towards it".

Her message, with its refreshing freshness, will continue to have effect long after this vibrant personality, who lived life to the fullest, is not with us physically.