Teacher’s word: Democratic parenting the best way to deal with teens

Being a teacher, then Principal and a mother, over the past years in countless conversations with parents and teenagers I have felt and seen frustration in both regarding their mutual relationship, which has inspired me to open up on this topic.

No parent in a perfect parent. But unpleasantness in relation between parents and child can be traumatic for the child and can spoil the long-germ relationship between the two.

Parents being older, more mature and well-wishers of their kids, can play a more constructive role in nurturing their kids.

Nowadays, most of the middle class parents are busy working to fulfil the financial needs of their family and in that rat race, unknowingly many tender hearts are being neglected.

Parent’s style, attitude, daily practices, their verbal and non-verbal expressions and actions characterise the parent-child relationship. A child should expect to see their parent as a ideal person to follow and not as a hard parent, whom they are afraid of.

Helicopter parenting with bubble wrapping the child is a big no no.

Rather the talk and actions of the parents should make their child feel secure, independent, being understood and felt loved unconditionally.

Quality time spent with them, encouraging them from time to time to take right action, ensuring discipline without resorting to humiliating lectures or tormenting the child, guiding them to read good books and talking to them politely can help them to become more awarded and responsible citizens, are some of the key points for a healthy parent-child relationship.

Lack of parental supervision, peer pressure, peer rejections, family history, loneliness, easy availability of substances of abuse and excessive misuse of social media are definitely affecting the teens a lot and making them prone to commit ting mistakes.

It becomes the duty of parents to monitor the activities of the child while giving them space to explore independently during that delicate phase of life, where intelligence and consciousness are hijacked by the hormones.

It is important to correct them and provide constructive feedback, but at the same time to be mindful, not to crush their spirit in the process.

In the end I would say, being a parent comes with a lot of responsibility and difficult decision making.

Democratic parenting style needs to be followed, where parents can make rules, which are flexible, depending upon different situations to create a healthy and comfortable environment to help the child to have a right guidance, more honest and open relationship with their parents.

The writer is Principal GMSSS, Manimajra, Sec 13, Chandigarh