Educative, evocative, entertaining

Johnson Thomas

It’s a lonely world out there and this film takes you deep into the heart of the two characters central to this story, putting forward a nuanced underlining of loss, grief, heartbreak and healing.

Adam (Andrew Scott), a screenwriter in London, is trying to script his own experience of loss which happened when he was just 12. He lost both his parents in a car crash just before his birthday. There are not too many people living in his apartment complex and after he evacuates due to a false alarm, he encounters Harry (Paul Mescal), a younger, more forward tenant of the building. After initially rebuffing Harry, Adam lets him in and thus begins the catharsis.

As the tentative friendship develops into a relationship, Adam starts getting magically transported to his hometown, where he discovers his parents, alive and well, but still the same age as they were when they died. His mother (Clare Foy) immediately recognises him as her middle-aged son, and over time, it becomes clear that Adam is basically trying to find answers to the innumerable questions that have been plaguing him since their death. In the process, we also discover how he felt as a closeted gay kid in the 1980s.

Adam is trying to relive experiences that he was cheated out of and his troubled lonely mind is searching for answers that he never got. Adam has been playing and replaying conversations that could never be… just so that he could imagine their presence in his life. Adam even tells his mother about how he did that in the years after their deaths. That is in fact one of the most haunting and poignant moments in this film.

The main theme of this film is loneliness. Adam was a lonely kid who had no one to talk to about being bullied or about being gay. His loneliness has now become a cloak that he uses to repulse people who try to get close to him. That is how he treated Harry at first. He speaks of failed relationships but admits to Harry that it’s been a long time since he’s been intimate with a man. Harry helps him open up gradually, taking him out clubbing, dancing and even sleeping over.

We see Adam getting drawn back to his childhood home and interacting with his parents. For the observer, it is confusing because his parents look younger than him. It’s only gradually that the confusion clears up and we understand that Adam is finally trying to deal with bottled-up chasms of pain and unhappiness in his own unique way. It’s his only avenue for healing from the devastating, unbearable loss he experienced 30 years back.

Haigh’s film has a strong message — of loneliness, loss and finding new ways of coming to terms with it. Paul Mescal and Andrew Scott dig deep to give stirring performances. Claire Foy and Jamie Bell portray the roles of parents beautifully.

Haigh lends intimate, surreal and supernatural touches to the storytelling here. The lighting is beautiful. The soundtrack is pure nostalgia and the final song is particularly heart-touching. Haigh’s stirring script, direction and the haunting cinematography do the rest.

This movie takes us on a journey about alienation, loneliness and life after a great loss and it’s educative, evocative and entertaining.