Webside humour
Sweet gesture
Sunil Sharma

An Israeli soldier, who just enlisted, asked the commanding officer for a three day pass.

The CO says "Are you crazy? You just joined the Israeli army, and you already want a three-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition."

So the soldier comes back a day later in an Arab tank!

The CO was so impressed, he asked, "How did you do it?"

"Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Arabs. I approached the border, and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up, the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the Arab soldier, "Do you want to get a three-day pass?

So we exchanged tanks!"

The right man

"For this job we need someone who is responsible," said the employer. "Then I'm your man," answered the potential employee. "On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."

Colour blind

A lady went to a pet shop. "I'd like to buy two yellow canaries," she told the owner.

"We don't have any canaries, but we have these," the owner said, as he showed the lady some pale green parakeets.

"That's not what I'm looking for," the lady stated. But the pet store owner refused to give up.

He said, "Just think of them as yellow canaries that aren't quite ripe yet."

All for fitness

A co-worker told me that I looked tired.

"I am," I said. "I just finished 100 push-ups."

"Oh really? When did you start doing push-ups?"

"Well, I did the first one in 1986."

But natural

The nine-year-old daughter walked in while her mother was getting ready for work.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Putting on my wrinkle cream," mom answered.

"Oh," she said, walking away. "I thought they were natural."

Bitter facts

One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we got married, you took the smaller piece of steak and gave me the other one. Now you take the large one. You don't love me any more..." "Nonsense, darling," replied the husband, "you just cook better now."

Code decode

A mother was showing her son how to zip up his coat. "The secret," she said, "is to get the left part of the zipper to fit in the other side before you try to zip it up." The boy looked at her quizzically... "Why does it have to be a secret?"

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