|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Nestled between the Brahmaputra valley and Bangladesh in the south, Meghalaya is one of the few places, in the world practicing the age-old tradition of matrilineal society, along with some tribes of South Africa, Asia and Indonesia, which follow matrilineal system even today. The three tribes of Meghalaya — Khasis, Garo and Jaintias trace their ancestry, inheritance and lineage from mother to daughter which is not the case in the rest of the country. The matrilineal system
gives a high status to the women here and cases of dowry death, female
foeticide are unheard of in this region. Girl child is welcomed here
and she carries the family name ahead. The children belong to mother’s
clan and, therefore, take the mother’s title after their names.
Children outside the wedlock are not considered illegitimate here as
they carry their mother’s title. The youngest girl known as khadduh
inherits the property while other siblings are provided with some
portion. Khadduh is also responsible for taking care of her old
parents and her siblings. In case, there is no girl child in the
family, then the family has to adopt one which very clearly shows the
importance of the girl child.
Another unique thing about this system is that the groom moves to his wife’s place after the wedding. A woman’s earning goes to her family, and not her in-laws. The son-in-law does not have much say in the family. He can’t even say anything to his children as the kids belong to other clan where the maternal uncle has the authority. It is interesting to know that traditionally after the marriage of maternal uncle, he, like other men goes to his wife’s house but every morning he has to come back to his mother’s place without even taking tea, to look after his sister’s children. The system is known as Thiah Shlur though this does not exist now but was practiced till 1920 and disappeared after the arrival of British. An anthropological study says that the matrilineal system goes back to a time when Khasis had several partners and it was hard to determine the paternity of children. In 1999, a movement started under the banner of Syngkhong Rympei Thymmai (SRT) against the gender discrimination with almost 4,000 supporters. The above-mentioned study is not supported by the SRT as it says that their ancestors used to stay away in battlefields and for this reason this system was raised.
Why this movement? One wouldn’t have felt the need for the change if the existing system was fair and practical. "Men feel suffocated due to this age-old tradition where the men are termed as Shongkha or the breeding bulls. All this has led to alcoholism, drug abuse and many other problems," says Pariat, who heads SRT with eight of its unit in and around Meghalaya. In 1960, the voice against gender discrimination was raised for the first time by men in Cherrapunji. Darningstone Lyngdoh led the movement. But due to lack of support the movement faded. Keith Albion Pariat says that he has grown up in this culture and always felt that his father was never given respect as he was never considered as the leader of the family. When a male loses his stature, his functionality becomes disturbed. Pariat ignored this age-old tradition and took up his father’s surname, though there was opposition, he adds. Since men don’t have property in their names, they find it difficult to take loans from banks. "When a male needs a loan, he has to approach his mother to get the papers of the land against which the bank gives loans. This further also leads to frustration because the mother keeps asking to return the papers as the land belongs to Khadduh, says another man, Teibor. There is also a threat of extinction of the tribe as many Khasi women are getting married outside the tribe, adds Pariat. The men in this matrilineal society are demanding equal rights in the family property, over their children and a respectful image in the society. Women have mixed opinion. Some feel that the change would bring harassment to the women. Very few women appreciate the change. Padma Shri awardee Patricia Mukhim, editor of Shillong Times, feels that Khasi men feel weak about their manhood when compared with outsiders. But there is nothing of this sort as this makes our society different from others. NOTE: The top photograph with the story titled "Growing up too soon", published on September 14, was used only for illustrative purposes. The children in the photograph were not connected with the story.
|
|||||
|
|
|||||
