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"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices sadly answered in unison. "Okay, daddy, you get the toy." Hard work pays A boss took one of his employees to show his new sports car. "That is amazing" the employee was fascinated. "That is true" replied boss "and if you set your new goals higher and work even harder I can get an even better car next year". On the wishlist A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish. "Ooh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband." said the wife. The fairy moved her magic stick and two tickets for the new QM2 luxury liner appeared in her hands. Now it was the husband’s turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime, so, I’m sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me." The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish... So the fairy made a circle with her magic stick and the husband became 92 years old. Swap the deal Santa bought a car on loan. He didn’t pay the dues. The bank took away his car. Santa: If I knew this, I’d have taken a loan for my marriage also. Take my advice The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks an older priest to join him on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confession box for a few suggestions. The old priest suggests, "Cross your arms over your chest and rub your chin with one hand." The new priest tries this. The old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, ‘I see,’ ‘yes,’ ‘go on,’ ‘I understand,’ and ‘how did you feel about that?’" The new priest says those things, trying them out. The old priest says, "Now, don’t you think that’s a little better than slapping your knee and saying ‘No shit! What happened next?’" Cut to cut Boss: "Where you have been for the past one hour"? Worker: "I went to get my hair cut". Boss: "What? You got your hair cut during company time". Worker: "It grew during company time". Boss: "Not all the hair". Worker: "I didn’t get it all cut".
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