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Webside
Humour
Husband: “Please come fast. I am having an argument with my wife and she says she will jump from your hotel window”. Manager: “Sir, I’m sorry, but this is your personal issue.” Husband angrily: “That I know, but this damn window is not opening and this is your maintenance issue.” Smart reply An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, “Have you ever been arrested?” he wrote, “No.” The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the previous question, was “Why?” The applicant answered it anyway: “Never got caught.” Poisonous Two snakes were out taking a stroll when the son snake turns to the mother snake and asks: “Mommy! Are we poisonous?” “Why, yes we are,” says the second. Again the baby snake asks, “Are you sure we’re poisonous?” “Yes, we are very poisonous.” The baby snake becomes very upset. Again, he asks, “Are we really poisonous?” “Yes we are really poisonous. In fact, we’re the most poisonous snakes in the world. Why do you ask?” “I just bit my lip!!” The gold watch A judge was instructing the jury that a witness was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful because he changed his statement after he gave it to the police. “For example,” he said, “when I entered my chambers today, I was positive that I had my gold watch in my pocket. But then I remembered that I left in on my nightstand in my bedroom.” When the judge returned home that evening, his wife asked him “Why so much urgency for your watch? Isn’t sending three men to pick it up for you a bit extreme?” “What?” said the judge, “I didn’t send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?” “I gave it to the first one,” said the wife, “he knew exactly where it was.” Child-friendly Some newly married friends were visiting us when the topic of children came up. The bride said she wanted three children, while the young husband said two would be enough for him. They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes until the husband thought he’d put an end to things by saying boldly, “After our second child, I’ll just have a vasectomy.” Without a moment’s hesitation, the bride retorted, “Well, I hope you’ll love the third one as if it’s your own.” Open job This couple was heading to the hospital with their 16-year-old daughter, who was scheduled to undergo a tonsillectomy. During the ride they talked about the procedure. “Dad,” the teenager asked “how are they going to keep my mouth open during surgery?” Without hesitation her father quipped, “They’re going to give you a phone.” Marriage definition “Marriage is like a duck. On the surface, it looks cool and effortless, but underneath, everybody’s paddling like hell.”
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A husband calls up the hotel management from his hotel room at 8th floor.