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Webside humour No cheating Parent: “What's that”? Teacher: “With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating”.
The lucky senior A friend of mine was sitting on a lawn chair, sunning and reading, when he was startled by a fairly late model car crashing through a hedge and coming to rest on his lawn. He helped the elderly driver out and sat her on a lawn chair. "My goodness" he exclaimed, "you are quite old to be driving!" "Yes" she replied, " I am old enough that I don't need a license." "Oh really," he said, "and why is that?" "The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver's license." I told him "yes" and handed it to him. He took scissors out of a drawer, cut the license into pieces and threw them in the wastebasket. "You won't be needing that anymore," he said. "So I thanked him and left.” A boy had a very bad memory and he used to forget his password on the facebook account very often. Then he came up with an idea and set his password as ‘INCORRECT’. Now whenever he forgets the password, the computer would remind him: ‘Your password is incorrect’. Problem solved! Time lag A out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he'd enjoyed on a previous trip to the city. Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said, "You know, it's been over five years since I first came in here." "You'll have to wait your turn, sir," replied the harried waiter. "I can only serve one table at a time." Knowledge pill A somewhat advanced society has figured how to package basic knowledge in pill form. A student, needing some learning, goes to the pharmacy and asks what kind of knowledge pills are available. The pharmacist says "Here's a pill for English literature." The student takes the pill and swallows it and has new knowledge about English literature! "What else do you have?" asks the student. "Well, I have pills for art history, biology, and world history," replies the pharmacist. The student asks for these, and swallows them and has new knowledge about those subjects. Then the student asks, "Do you have a pill for math?" The pharmacist says, "Wait just a moment", and goes back into the storeroom and brings back a whopper of a pill and plunks it on the counter. "I have to take that huge pill for math?" inquires the student. The pharmacist replied, "Well, you know ... math always was a little hard to swallow." Mum’s the word A salesman rang the bell at a suburban home, and the door was opened by a nine-year-old boy puffing on a long black cigar. Hiding his amazement, the salesman asked the young man, "Is your mother home?" The boy took the cigar out of his mouth, flicked ashes on the carpet, and asked, "What do you think?"
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Teacher: “Well, at least there's one thing I can say about your son”.