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A man’s wife was drowned in tsunami. After several days while he was walking happily on the beach, the waves were touching his feet intermittently, he frowned and shouted: “No matter, how much you touch my feet, I’ll not take her back.” Riding on a heart A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley, when he spotted a world-famous heart surgeon in his shop. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc can I ask you a question?" The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I also can open hearts, take valves out, fix'em, put in new parts and when I finish this will work just like a new one. So how come I get a pittance and you get the really big money, when you and I are doing basically the same work?" The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic: "Try doing it with the engine running"! Spouse and secret During a recent vacation in Atlantic City, a couple went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a woman from the back of the theatre yelled out: "Hey, how'd you do that?" "I could tell you, madam", the magician answered, "But then I'd have to kill you." After a short pause, she yelled back, "OK, then ... Just tell my husband." Grave matter During a hectic night of mail processing at the post office, a number of letters fell off an elevated conveyor belt and scattered onto the floor. Before the area supervisor had a chance to pick them up, the facility manager, who had a reputation for being stern, came upon the scene. "Why is this mail on the floor?" he demanded angrily. Without hesitation the supervisor replied, "Gravity, sir." Making babies A third-grade girl came home from school. She was very happy, and her mom noticed this. Mom asked, "What makes you so happy today?" The girl said, "Mom, we learned how to make babies in school today!" Thinking that third grade was a bit early for that, she asked her daughter to tell her how. "It's easy, Mom -- you just drop the y, and add ies," the daughter said. Up in air An airline pilot was scheduled to take a flight from New York to Los Angeles. The weather was too bad in New York to allow his usual on-time departure. The weather in New York finally cleared and the pilot asked for his departure clearance. He was very dismayed to hear that he had another delay due to the increased traffic now leaving New York. Sometime later he finally received his clearance and decided he would try to make up the time lost by asking for a direct route to Los Angeles. Halfway across the country he was told to turn due South. Knowing that this turn would now throw him further behind schedule he inquired, quite agitated, to the controller for the reason of the turn off course. The controller replied that the turn was for noise abatement. The pilot was infuriated and said to the controller, "Look buddy, I am already way behind schedule with all the delays you guys have given me today. I really don't see how I could be causing a noise problem for pedestrians when I am over six miles above the earth!" The controller answered in a calm voice, "Apparently, Captain, you have never heard two 747's collide!"
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Good riddance
