Webside HUMOUR
Lucky day

One day on his way to work, a man stopped at the cafeteria as it began to rain heavily. Forgetting that he hadn’t brought an umbrella, he reached for the nearest one when he got up to leave.

"That’s my umbrella," a woman immediately scolded him. Abashed at his mistake, he said sorry and walked on to his office. He was drenched by the time he arrived. Once there, he discovered three umbrellas that he had left in the office over the months, and he decided to bring them home at the end of the day. On the way back, he ran into the same woman who had confronted him earlier.

She looked at three umbrellas, then at him, and tartly remarked, "You did real well for yourself today, didn’t you?"

Marketing strategy

One day a store manager overheard his counter salesman saying to a customer, "No, ma’am, we haven’t had any for some weeks now, and it doesn’t look as if we’ll be getting any soon."

Alarmed by what was being said, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn’t true, ma’am. Of course, we’ll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for it a couple of weeks ago."

Then he drew the salesman aside and growled, "Never, ever say we don’t have something, it brings bad reputation to the store. If we don’t have it, say we have ordered it and it`s on its way. Now, what was she asking for?"

"Rain", replied the salesman.

Second best

A middle aged man wasn’t feeling well, so he went to the doctor for a check up. After a thorough examination, the doctor said, "Well, based on my examination, the best thing for you is to cut out all sweets and fatty foods, give up alcohol, and stop smoking."

The man said, "Well, to be honest with you Doc, I don’t deserve the best. What’s the second best?"

Monsoon flu

George was rarely sick but on a Sunday he was drenched in the heavy monsoon rain and caught the flu. He just couldn’t go to work on Monday. He was glad because he learned just how much his wife loved him. She was so thrilled to have him home that, when the mailman arrived, she ran outside yelling, "My husband’s home! My husband’s home."

Defining rain

Tourist to a local: "How would you describe the rain in this part of the country"?

Local: "Little drops of water falling from the sky".

Salary status

The college president hired a new admissions administrator. At the conclusion of the interview, he said, "Please don’t tell anyone what we’re paying you."

"Don’t worry Sir," the new bureaucrat replied, "I’m as ashamed of my salary as you are."

Being Historical

A man complains to a friend, "I can’t take it anymore."

"What’s wrong?" his concerned friend asks.

"It’s my wife. Every time we have an argument,
she gets historical!"

"You mean hysterical," his friend said, chuckling.

"No, I mean HISTORICAL," the man insists. "Every argument we have, she’ll go .."I still remember that time when you ...."

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