Webside HUMOUR
Defamation suit

A man was sued by a woman for defamation of character.  She charged that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial he asked the judge, “This means that I cannot call Mrs. Johnson a pig?”

The judge said that was true. “Does this mean I cannot call a pig Mrs. Johnson?” the man asked.

The judge replied that he could indeed call a pig Mrs Johnson with no fear of legal action.

The man looked directly at Mrs Johnson and said, “Good afternoon, Mrs. Johnson.”

Looking good

While her husband was lying down, his wife removed his glasses. “You know, honey,” she said sweetly, “Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married.” “Honey,” he replied with a grin, “Without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!”

Private talk

While watching a movie recently, a man couldn’t hear the dialogue over the chatter of the two elderly women sitting in front of him. Unable to bear it any longer, he tapped one of them on the shoulder. “Excuse me,” he said, “I can’t hear.” “You should not,” she replied sharply. “This is a private conversation.”

Missing tail light

“Pull over the curb,” said the policeman. “You don’t have a tail light.” The motorist stepped out, looked in back of the car, and stood quivering and speechless. “Oh, it’s not that bad,” said the policeman. The man mumbled, “It’s not the taillight I am worried about. Where are my wife and trailer?”

Compiled by Sunil Sharma