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Two friends rented a boat and went fishing in a lake. The first day, they caught 30 fish. As they were preparing to go into shore, one man said to the other, "Let’s mark this spot so we can come here again tomorrow." The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the same guy said, "Did you mark that spot?" His friend replied, "Yeah, I put a big ‘X’ on the bottom of the boat." The first one said, "That was dumb! What if we don’t get the same boat today?" Speed limit A man gets pulled over by the police for speeding. The cop walks up to the car and says to the driver, "Sir, did you know that you were going 60 miles an hour?" The driver says, "Officer, there is no way I could have been going 60 miles an hour." The cop says, "Really! Why is that? The driver replies," I could not have been going 60 miles an hour because I’ve only been out driving for 25 minutes." Election time A politician was walking home from the county courthouse the evening of election day when he came upon a young boy sitting on the curb, bawling his eyes out. "Why are you crying?" the politician asked. "My dad died," the boy replied. "That’s terrible, when did it happen?" "Five years ago," the boy said. "Five years ago? And you are still this upset?" "It’s not that," the boy said. "It’s just that my dad voted today, but he didn’t come to see me." Woman power A radical feminist is getting on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat. She thinks to herself, "Here’s another man trying to keep up the customs of a patriarchal society by offering a poor, defenceless woman his seat," so she pushes him back onto the seat. A few minutes later, the man tries to get up again.`A0She is still insulted so she refuses to let him up again. Finally, the man says, "Look, lady, you’ve got to let me get up. I’m five blocks past my stop already." Memory game Man: "My wife has the worst memory I ever heard of." Friend: "Forgets
everything, eh?" Compiled by Sunil Sharma |
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