WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Phone call

A guy walks into work, and both of his ears are all bandaged up. The boss says, "What happened to your ears?"

He says, "Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and shhh! I accidentally answered the iron."

The boss says, "Well, that explains one ear, but what happened to your other ear?"

He says, "Well, jeez, I had to call the doctor."

A pipe burst in a doctor’s house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600.

The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor."

The plumber quietly answered, "Neither did I when I was a doctor."

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the supermarket, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma’am, they’re dead."

A woman lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented,

"Hmmm.... That’s funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are 20 $1 bills."

The boy quickly replied, "That’s right, lady. The last time I found a lady’s purse, she didn’t have any change for a reward."

A man suddenly began attending church faithfully on Sunday mornings instead of going fishing. The pastor was highly gratified and told him, "How wonderful it makes me feel to see you at services with your good wife."

"Well, Preacher," said the fisherman, "it’s a matter of choice. I’d rather hear your sermon than hers."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma