Webside Humour
For love’s sake

A wealthy merchant of 84 married a 25-year-old fashion model. They had a wonderful honeymoon in Switzerland but, unfortunately, the old boy suffered a coronary and was hospitalised.

When his young wife came to see him, the old man said, "Sweetheart, your future has been taken care of regardless of what happens to me. You will have an income of $250,000 a year, my home in Palm Springs, my ranch in Texas, my Mercedes. You’ll never need to worry about money."

"Oh, sweetheart, please don’t talk that way," his young wife exclaimed.

"You’ve been so good to me already. If you go, I’ll be devastated. Oh, there must be something I can do to help you. Please... tell me what I can do?"

"Well," the old man gasped, "you can quit pinching the inlet tube to my oxygen supply for a start."

"Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees.

"Yes, sir," the new employee replied.

"Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she stopped in to see you."

"Doctor, are you sure I’m suffering from pneumonia? I’ve heard once about a doctor treating someone with pneumonia and finally he died of typhus."

"Don’t worry, it won’t happen to you. If I treat someone with pneumonia, he will die of pneumonia only."

Customer to waiter: "Everyday you charge me money for a cup of coffee. It will be wonderful if you serve me coffee free of cost today".

Waiter: "Sir, everyday you drink coffee from a filled cup. It will be wonderful if you drink it from an empty cup today.

A salesman requested identification from a department-store customer who had just written a personal cheque for her purchase. After fumbling through her purse, she presented him with what she said was the only thing that bore both her name and address. It was a notice of insufficient funds from her bank.