WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Hard workers

A passerby noticed a couple of city workers working along the city sidewalks. The man was quite impressed with their hard work, but he couldn’t understand what they were doing. Finally, he approached the workers and asked, "I appreciate how hard you’re both working, but what the heck are you doing? It seems that one of you digs a hole, and then the other guy immediately fills it back up again."

One of the workers said, "The third guy who plants the trees is off sick today."

A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewellery store.

"Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don’t want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch and we forget about this?"

The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something less expensive?"

A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Anthony proposed to me an hour ago."

"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he is an atheist. Mom, he doesn’t even believe there’s a Hell."

Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we’ll show him how wrong he is."

On a whim, a man decided to get his wife a dozen roses and`A0surprise her after work.`A0The minute he opened the door, his wife took one look at the flowers in his hand and started screaming, "This is`A0the worst day that I have ever had! The kids have been`A0terrible. They got in a food fight, the washing machine`A0broke and flooded the basement, I burned dinner, the dog`A0chewed up my best pair of shoes...AND NOW YOU’VE COME HOME DRUNK!"

While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of medical students. "As you can see," she says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched. Michael, what would you do in a case like this?" "Well," ponders the student, "I suppose I’d limp too."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma