WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Good news

A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat.

Him: "I’m sorry dear but I’m up to my neck in work today."

Her: "But I’ve got some good news and some bad news for you."

Him: "OK darling, but as I’ve got no time now, just give me the good news."

Her: "Well, the air bag works".

One of my college friends asked a group of us for advice on`A0organising his final report for the year. "Why don’t you`A0use Roman numerals to head the different sections?" another`A0friend suggested.

"I already thought of that," he replied. "But my keyboard`A0doesn’t have Roman numerals on it."

Little Johnny told his mother that he had been playing postman. "Postman? How could you do that when you had no letters?"

"Oh, I had some letters," replied Johnny. "I was looking in your closet up in your room and I found a packet of letters tied up with a ribbon, and I posted one under every door on`A0the street."

A young American tourist goes on a guided tour of a creepy old castle. At the end of the tour the guide asks her how she enjoyed it. She admits to being a bit worried about seeing a ghost in some of the dark cobwebby rooms and passages.

"Don’t worry," says the guide, "I’ve never seen a ghost all the time I’ve been here."

"How long is that?" asks the girl.

"About 300 years."

— Compiled by Sunil Sharma