WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Smart selling

A man applied for a job as an insurance salesman. Where the form requested "prior experience", he jotted down "Lifeguard". Nothing else.

"We’re looking for someone who can not only sell insurance, but who can sell himself," said the hiring manager for the insurance company. "How does working as a lifeguard pertain to salesmanship?" "I could not swim," he replied. He got the job.

Dog licence

During a countywide drive to round up all unlicensed dogs,`A0a patrolman signalled a car to pull over to the curb.`A0`A0When the driver asked why he had been stopped, the officer`A0pointed to the big dog sitting on the seat beside him.`A0"Does your dog have a licence?" he asked. "Oh, no," the man said, "He doesn’t need one; I always do`A0the driving."

A kid comes home from his first day at school.His mother asks, "Well, what did you learn today?" The kid replies, "Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow."

A man goes to the doctor with a swollen foot. After a careful`A0examination, the doctor gives the man a pill big enough to`A0choke a horse.

"I’ll be right back with some water," the doctor tells him.`A0The doctor has been gone a while and the man loses patience.`A0He hobbles out to the drinking fountain, forces the pill down`A0his throat and gobbles down water until the pill clears his`A0throat. He hobbles back into the examining room.`A0The doctor comes back with a bucket of warm water. "Ok, after`A0the tablet dissolves, soak that leg for at least 30 minutes."

A man in a hurry taking his eight-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited.

"Uh-oh, I think I just made an illegal turn," the man said. "It’s okay, Dad" the boy said. "The police car right behind us did the same thing."

Compiled by Sunil Sharma