WEBSIDE HUMOUR
Doc’s version

During the course of being interviewed by the Press, the noted doctor was asked by a reporter: “Doctor, did you ever make a serious mistake?” “Yes,” was the reply, “I once cured a millionaire in three visits!”

At home

A Navy officer was cutting through the crew’s quarters of his ship one day and happened upon a sailor reading a magazine with his feet up on the small table in front of him.

“Sailor! Do you put your feet up on the furniture at home?” the officer demanded. “No, sir, but we don’t land airplanes on the roof either.”

Dream cabin

A friend and his wife were considering travelling to Alaska for a trip that the husband had long dreamed of taking.

He kept talking about how great it would be to stay in a log cabin without electricity, to hunt moose, and drive a dog team instead of a car.

“If we decided to live there permanently, away from civilisation, what would you miss the most?” he asked his wife. She replied, “You.”

True wisdom

An angel appears at a faculty meeting and tells the dean that in return for his unselfish and exemplary behaviour, the Lord will reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom, or beauty.

Without hesitating, the dean selects infinite wisdom.

“Done!” says the angel, and disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning.

Now, all heads turn toward the dean, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light. One of his colleagues whispers, “Say something.” The dean sighs and says, “I should have taken the money.”

Fitness test

At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been cancelled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned.

One soldier mused, “Does it bother anyone else that the Army doesn’t seem to care how well we can shoot, but they are extremely interested in how fast we can run?”

Hard sell

An airliner flew into a violent thunderstorm and was soon swaying and bumping around the sky.

One nervous lady happened to be sitting next to a clergyman and turned to him.

“Can’t you do something?” she demanded angrily.

“I’m sorry ma’am,” the reverend said gently, “I’m in sales, not 
management.”

Compiled by Sunil Sharma