Listen for success
Anureet Sibia Dhillon

Active listening implies listening with intensity, empathy and acceptance. Karl Menninger rightly exclaimed, "The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward, and we want to sit in their radius."

When someone listens, he says to us:

You are important

You are worth my time and attention

You are saying something worth hearing

You are an interesting person

You are ok.

The average employee spends about three-quarters of every working day in verbal communication. Nearly half the time is spent listening. The average employee is about 25 per cent effective as a listener. The various barriers to listening are:

• Believing that you know all that there is to know about the subject

• Influence of preconceived beliefs

• Physical appearance, voice, pronunciation, accent and mannerisms of the speaker that cause distraction

• Ignoring the non-verbal message and listening to words only

• Listening to details, excluding the overall message

• Inattention caused due to being sleepy, tired, hungry, thinking of more important things and trying to think of a question to ask the speaker

• Reduced concentration as the mind moves faster than speech.

David Schwartz has said in his book 'The Magic Of Thinking Big': "Big people monopolise the listening. Small people monopolise the talking."

Anthony Eden considered Winston Churchill's outstanding leadership characteristic to be his willingness to listen: he never cut off a suggestion with a curt dismissal but encouraged elaboration.

San Walton, founder of Wal-Mart and one of the richest men in America, listened. Once he flew his aircraft to Mt. Pleasant, Texas, and parked the plane with instructions to the co-pilot to meet him 100 or so miles down the road. He then flagged a Wal-Mart truck to stop and rode the rest of the way to "chat with the driver." He said, "It seemed like so much fun."

Ben Feldman was the first insurance salesman to pass the goal of $ 25 million in one year and then to double that figure. He had been New York Life's leading salesman for more than two decades. He did this in East Liverpool, a small town of 20,000 on the Ohio River. When asked for his secret, he said:

• Work hard

• Think big

• Listen well

Hearing aids

Here are some ways to improve listening habits:

• Stop the initial evaluation

• Do not let a speaker's other characteristics distract you

• Make a note: summarise what has been said

• Think slightly ahead of the speaker

• Mull over each thought expressed by the speaker

• Identify a speaker's evidence and arguments

• Avoid letting your own feelings interfere with listening

Listening is the key to success. As Irving Shapiro, former chairman of Du Pont, said, "People who accomplish things do more listening than talking." Thus, in order to be successful we must cultivate a habit of listening effectively.