STAMPED IMPRESSIONS
Birth of the new age mother 
Reeta Sharma

I thought I knew her like the back of my palm. She had grown up right before my eyes. But I discovered a new dimension of her in the past nine months. She surfaced as a stranger, who talked an alien language. I wondered whether she was rattling the new ‘lingo’ from a book as she talked to me on the phone.
No, she was not reading from a book. I soon learnt that she had purposely acquired the knowledge to be fully equipped to deal with the ‘greatest change’ in her body and mind. Yes. She was pregnant. She had always wanted to be a mother. In fact, she had been yearning to be one.

Nine months have passed and she has now grabbed the title ‘mother’, the word with which she has been emotionally involved since her childhood. These nine months and the ‘final day’ unfolded an unseen, unimaginative part of her side. She categorically emerged as the ‘new age mother’.

When she experienced the initial three months of nausea, she did not display any signs of disgust. She bore the period with serenity, saying: "This happens because of hormonal and psychological changes in the body. Thank God, I have extremely congenial atmosphere at home. I do not allow myself to be anxious, hence, I am able to subdue my nausea."

What do you mean by that, I asked. "You see, some unfortunate women, who are faced with domestic violence or traumatised atmosphere suffer experience more nausea," she rattled like an experienced doctor.

How do you conclude all this, I continue to question. "I have read at length on the Internet. There are amazing sites which can offer you a lot of information. Besides, of course, I have my doctor, " she shared enthusiastically. Each time she surprised me with her knowledge on each aspect of pregnancy. Like, she knew exactly why her doctor had put her on a particular diet. When she was suffering from loose motions, she knew why she was forbidden from taking proteins.

Finally came the ninth month, when she was put on bed rest. I thought she had been working too hard. "No, no. It is not for those reasons. Actually, my amniotic fluid has reduced," she explained.

During our endless chatting, it was heartening to discover that the workshops she had regularly attended had prepared her for an easy labour. Her husband too was trained in the workshops to assist and nurse his wife in those agonising hours.

I was keen to learn how these new age mothers viewed the gender issues. Do they still yearn for a baby boy? Was the rapidly falling sex ratio of any concern to them? I feel that they are the ones who could possibly give some lead and direction to women who are still shackled by society’s biases. Thus I prodded her: "What do you wish to have, a girl or a boy?"

"Though I have had three ultrasounds, I have not asked the sex of my child. I hope I have a girl. A home like mine should have a girl, where the girl child can grow with dignity, love and enjoy equality," she answered with conviction.

During labour, I discovered yet another side of her. Despite being in excruciating pain, she directed the course of labour right from making an effort to consume juices and coconut water to refurbish her energy to sitting on a three-foot-round ball while having contractions to continuously walking to do her breathing exercises. All the time, she was fully in control of herself. She also ensured that she did not scream, shout or cry "because that only drains a woman’s energy."

Finally, when the baby arrived and the doctor held it upside down and announced, "Congratulations, you have got a baby girl," a blissful smile spread on her exhausted face. I could also see a matching glow on the face of her husband, who was still attending on her.

This feature was published on May 22, 2004