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The place of grandparents is with grandkids, not in old-age homes
I am sad to learn that like in the western countries, old-peoples’ homes are mushrooming in our country too. It is indeed as shameful as it is heart-rending. Those who want to remain deprived of the love and doting affection of parents and grandparents by sending them to old-peoples’ homes simply do not realise what they are missing. I see this situation from the point of view of the relationship between grandchildren and grandparents, and the role that the latter play in our lives. It is at the level of this smallest social unit—the family— that the bitter seeds of partition are thus sown. How then will not the society, the nation and the world remain divided? There is something sinister about the partition mentality and those who uphold it. Partition, be it of any kind, is not a healthy solution to any problem. It imposes constraints on everyone’s boundaries, and constricts and restricts freedom, peace of mind and happiness. And when boundaries are diminished, no one can remain satisfied — let alone contented and happy. Sheen Kaaf aptly put it: Pehle zameen banti, phir ghar bhi bant gaya, Insaan apne aap main kitna
simat gaya. |
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With their long and vast range of experiences in life, grandparents are an invaluable source of education and wisdom for the younger generation. By participating in the upbringing of children at home, they are able to shape the future citizens of the country into responsible and disciplined members of society. Grandparents can inculcate positive values in their grandchildren through example. Whenever children feel down in the dumps or have some problem that troubles them, they can always rely on their affectionate and doting grandparents to lend them a patient ear and guide them gently but surely out of troubled waters. With such understanding, children are sure to grow up into considerate and caring adults. No matter concerning their loved ones is too small for doting grandparents. It is truly said that each child brings out the child in his/her grandparents. It is preposterous to presume that by living in segregation, separating kitchens, sending the elderly to old-age homes, and stopping them from ‘interfering’ in the life of their children and grandchildren one can resolve the problems that may plague the joint family system. Instead of sorting out differences and clearing up misunderstandings, this segregation of generations drives mental wedges and widens the cracks in the foundation of the joint family system and its inherent binding values. To say the least, the children, especially the grandchildren, are deprived of access to affectionate grandparents and their enormous wisdom accumulated over the years. They are the biggest losers in this segregation. Living together with grandparents is so much fun. It hurts me to know that as in foreign countries, in India too old-peoples’ home are coming up fast. I fail to understand the mentality of the people who ignore or choose to forget the sacrifices their parents must have made in bringing them up. There are those who might argue against the benefits of living with grandparents, and parents, but I feel that the benefits far outweigh the minor drawbacks, if any. I, for one, can’t have enough of my grandparents. Thank God for them. |
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