Monday, December 30, 2002		Cyber Humour

LAST week my wife and I purchased a new computer. We ran into some difficulties while setting it up so we called the customer support phone number we found in the manual.
I picked up the phone and called the number. A man answered the phone and I explained the problem to him.
He began rattling off computer jargon. This confused us even more. "Sir," I said politely, "Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?"
"Okay," the computer support guy said, "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"

Fired

Here I sit, broken-hearted,

All logged in, but work unstarted.

First net.this and net.that,

And a hot buttered bun for net.fat.

The boss comes by, and I play the game,
Then I turn back to net.flame.

Is there a cure I need your views,

For someone trapped in net.news?

I need your help, I say between sobs,

Because I’ll soon be listed in net.jobs.

Moron me

A fellow computer programmer for a consulting group had designed some software for one of our largest accounts. He asked my help in putting it into operation. At first, he handled most of the work. Eventually, though, he asked me to help with the last phase of the training. When I sat down with one woman and told her I would be showing her how to make changes to the files, she sighed with relief. "I’m so glad you’re teaching me instead of him." Surprised, I said that my colleague was far more experienced than I was. Yes," she said, "but I feel much more comfortable with you. I get nervous around really smart people."

Unaffordable

I went with a friend to help him shop for a computer. Looking through the different varieties, he said, "I don’t think I can afford one of these big ones (desktop machines). I think I’ll have to go with one of these little ones (laptops)."

Culled from the Net