Saturday, October 12, 2002
N E T P I C K I N G


Men's cooking

Illustration by Sandeep JoshiIt's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion.

1. The woman goes to the store.

2. The woman fixes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.

3. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils, and takes it to the man, who is lounging beside the grill.

4. The man places the meat on the grill.

5. The woman goes inside to set the table and check the vegetables.

6. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.

7. The man takes the meat off the grill and hands it to the woman.

8. The woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table.

9. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

10. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, he concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.

 


Intelligent wish

An Indian, a Malaysian and a Pakistani were sipping a smuggled barrel of beer on a Saudi coast when all of a sudden the Saudi Police arrived and arrested them. They were initially sentenced to death but later were sentenced to life imprisonment. But as it was a national holiday, the Sheikh reduced their sentence to just 20 whiplashes on their back. When the whipping punishment was to start the Sheikh said "As it is my wife's birthday today, I grant each of you a wish before we start whipping you." The Malaysian thought for a while and asked to tie a pillow to his back. But the pillow lasted for only 10 lashes. The Pakistani was watching all this and when his turn came he asked for two pillows. The pillows could not even hold up against ten lashes.

As the Indian’s turn came the Sheikh said " You are from a very small and weak country, your football team and your golfers are terrible, you can have two wishes". "Thank you, Most Royal & Merciful Highness" the Indian replied. "My first wish is that I want 40 hard lashes",the Indian said. The Sheikh was surprised but asked for his second wish. The Indian said "Please tie this Pakistani on my back".

The opening!

A man applied for a job. After filling out all of his applications he waited anxiously for the outcome. The employer read all his applications and said, "We have an opening for people like you."

"Oh, great," the man said, "What is it?"

"It's called the door!".

— Culled from the Net by Sunil Sharma