Sunday, April 14, 2002		Stressbusters

The dynamics of modern marriages
V.K. Kapoor

A primary relationship is often stressful. Two people, each with different histories, different personalities, different needs, and different ways of doing things are trying to live under the same roof and get along with each other on a daily basis.

That’s a pretty tall order even under the best of circumstances.

One of the main difficulties that couples face reolves around expectations.

Each person in the relationship beings expectations

— a set of explicit expectations,

— a set of implicit expectation and

— a set of unreallistic expectations.

These expectations when in conflict with the other person’s expectations and realities of life, create stress.

During the course of a relationship, each partner may go through a series of transitions, such as the death of a parent, through a series of transitions, such as the death of a parent, the loss of a job, or physical illness.

The couple may go through transitions, such as relocation, the birth of a child, or the change of a job.

All of these changes have an impact on the relationship and produce stress.

Many couples experiencing the symptoms of stress breakdown can suddenly think that their love relationship is at an end.

And suddenly the endearing personality differences that once fascinated and intrigued them become utterly irritating and intolerable.

A good sexual relationship is difficult when you are avoiding sensory stimulation!

(The writer is a former senior Haryana-cadre police officer)