Sunday, July 23, 2000		Article

BILL CLINTON, the very name conjures up the image of a man who does everything with an act of panache, more-so when one happens to see through the ‘other’ side of him — that of the saxophone wielding charmer who dances his way, with ease, into the hearts of many a nubile young thing.

Bill’s story (Bollywood style) goes somewhat like this... One evening after a hard day’s work Bill comes home to relax. Not finding Hillary at home, he allows his ‘basic instincts’ to overtake him, kick starts his mobike and rides off singing "Yeh jawani hai diwani, ha-meri rani, Ruk - jao jani, dekh zara peeche murh ke, I am Billy Billy aha, Billy Billy Billy"! In the back lawns of White House he chances upon a new intern Monica, for the first time. Parks the bike and walks up to her, introduces himself, "Bill mein ek lahar si uthi hai abhi, Koi taza hawa chali hai abhi"! Monica becomes flustered and retorts, "Bill will pyar vyar main kya janu re, janu to janu bas itna ki tu to Prez Americana re"! Not to be defeated, Bill in his unmistakable andaz professes his feelings for her, "Bill tera deewana hai sanam, ho Bill tera" — till Monica yields, "Jante hain hum" and love blossoms!

Hillary returns and notices a change in Bill’s behaviour. Well past midnight when Bill has not yet retired to bed, she asks him, "Bill-e-nadan tujhe hua kya hai, aakhir is marz ki wajah kya hai"? Bill wanting to be left alone requests, "Bill ki girah khol do kucch na pucho, ab tum chali hi to jao"!

Hillary senses danger and coaxes him to pour his heart out — "Aye Bill mujhe bata de tu kis pe cha gaya hai, hai kaun wo’h jisne aakar, tujhko chura liya hai"! Bill cannot hold back any longer. He confesses, "Bill kya kare jab kisi ko, kisi se pyar hojaye".

Night somehow passes off, but Hillary cannot reconcile to the idea of having a second lady within the White House. She rings up Dorothy, "Bill diwana bin sajni ke mane na, wo’h pagla hai samjhane se samjhe na"! "Don’t worry, dear, I’ll set him right, that’s what mothers-in-law are meant for", Dorothy consoles her and calls up Kenneth.

Kenneth collects evidence and confronts Bill, "Jaag Bill-e-diwana, rut jaagi wasle yaar ki, basi hui dhund mein, kya sooji tujhe pyaar ki"? Seeing that Bill is not willing to relent he approaches Monica, "Chura liya hai tumne jo Bill ko, shakal nahin dikhana intern, badal ke rakh doonga zindigani agar na meri mani, madam"? Monica on a platonic trip whimpers, Bill ek mandir hai, Bill ek mandir hai, pyar ki hoti jismein hai pooja, aisa mera Bill hai"?

Kenneth returns and tells Hillary, that "Monica and Bill Na honge juda yeh wada raha"? Hillary, puts on the war paint and catches Monica by her hair, Hillary ki baat agar tujhe samajh na ayee, to dekh tera haal kya karoongi main aur meri mai, ha re ha soch le tu, samajh bhi le tu...haa’

Seeing venom in Hillary’s eyes Monica buckles and backtracks, " Bill cheez kya hai aap meri jaan lijiye, bas ek bar mere future par dhyan dijiye, Is anjuman mein aap ko rahna hai anth tak, provided, mujh garib ko billion dollar ka daan dijiye!

The deal is struck and Hillary returns home triumphantly singing, "Bill da mamla ab, ho gaya, settle, Monica nu maine dikha ditta, sada solid mettle....’

Poor Bill, heartbroken, boards Air Force 1; destination India, its back to business, "Bill ka khilona hai toot gaya...’ Never mind, life goes on ! Tomorrow is another. day !