Prompt service

THREE Insurance salesmen were sitting in a restaurant boasting about each companies’ service. The first one said, "When one of our insured died suddenly on Monday, we got the news that evening and were able to process the claim for the wife and had mailed a check on Wednesday evening". The second one said, "When one of our insured died without warning on Monday, we learned of it in two hours and were able to hand-deliver a check the same evening".

The last salesman said, "That’s nothing. Our office is on the 20th floor of the World Trade Centre, Tower 1. One of our insured who was washing a window on the 85th| floor, slipped and fell. We’ handed him his check as he passed our floor".

DEEP within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate. "Dear," she chirped, "I think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted."

"CONGRATULATIONS my boy!" said the groom’s uncle. "I’m sure you’ll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I’m not getting married until tomorrow." Protested his nephew.

"I know," replied the uncle. "That’s exactly what I mean."

(The jokes have been culled from various sites on the Internet by Sunil Sharma)