Groom wanted, not fake promises

Pushpa Girimaji

I have a peculiar problem. As I do not have any parents or siblings and am a middle-aged divorcee, I contacted an online marriage bureau that claimed to specialise in matchmaking for people like me. Their charges were high and included the optional charge of Rs 25,000 for doing a thorough background check on the prospective grooms. I opted for that and paid them the sum. After about three months, they sent me the details of three men, out of whom I chose one as our interests seemed to match. First we corresponded over e-mail as he did not live in India and then met three times. We then decided to get married. Just two days before our marriage, a friend who came to attend it, saw his photo and said he was a trickster who had cheated several women. I thought my friend had mistaken him for someone else. But when I mentioned this to him over phone as a joke, he suddenly got very angry and called off the wedding! I realised my friend was right. I could not contact him ever again on his cell number. I was lucky enough to escape the clutches of this man, but I could well have been a victim. I want the man caught and punished. How do I do this?

You must give his picture to the cybercell of the local police, which specialises in these kinds of cases and lodge a complaint so that he is brought to book. You may be able to file the complaint online. For all you know, they may well have this man on their radar. You can also warn others about the man through social media.

You are really lucky that you escaped marrying this man and losing your money. Only recently, I read about a similar case, where the man told his wife-to-be that he had landed in Delhi and had been detained by customs as he was carrying expensive jewellery and gifts for her and needed to pay a duty of Rs 7.5 lakhs, which he did not have with him. The woman, a resident of Hyderabad, transferred the money to his account and then never heard from him. This marriage was also fixed through a matrimonial website!

If you talk to the cyber police (Economic Offences Wing) in different cities or districts, you will hear about many such cases from them. Unfortunately, people do not always complain and this helps the culprits escape. I would also suggest that you look at the websites of cyber cells (www.cybercelldelhi.in for example) to understand the precautions that one needs to take against online frauds.

I would suggest that you lodge a complaint against the matrimonial website too as they may well be hand in glove with this fraudster. I must mention that different kinds of cyber crimes are on the increase these days and one needs to be extra-careful. As per the National Crime Records Bureau, cyber crimes (reported cases) increased from 9,622 in 2014 to 12, 317 in 2016.

The marriage bureau is saying that their checks had found him to be a decent man and that they do not believe he is a cheat. They are also saying that they have done due diligence and cannot be held liable for the cancellation of the marriage. What should I do?

If he is not a cheat, let the marriage bureau produce him or get him to respond to your phone calls. The matrimonial website cannot escape liability in this case, particularly because they collected money specifically for doing a background check on the man and cleared him. It’s only on the basis of their assurance that you decide to marry this man. I would suggest that you file a case against the marriage bureau before the consumer court, seeking not just refund of the money paid by you, but also compensation for the money spent by you on the wedding arrangements and the mental anguish that you suffered as a result of their negligent and deficient service. By filing this case, you are teaching the bureau a lesson and also warning others about it. I must also tell you that consumer courts are handling many such cases these days and are awarding decent compensation, costs and punitive damages, besides ordering refund of the money paid to the matrimonial websites.