M A I N   N E W S

‘God, let my son die before me’
Amarjit Thind
Tribune News Service

22 NP (Raisingh Nagar), March 24
While all parents pray for the long and successful life of their children, a distraught mother of this village does the opposite, she pleads with the Almighty to take away her son before her.

The saga of suffering of this 70-year-old widow is an unending one. Call it the cruel twist of fate. She gave birth to three sons, all of whom were diagnosed with myopathy, a rare and incurable congenital defect of the fibre nerves.

Belonging to a Kashmiri Sikh family, Mrs Swaran Kaur today lives amid poverty and squalor in her small hut house and with difficulty musters strength to carry her 25-year-old son on her back to the toilet, bath him and feed him.

In a choked voice, she narrated her tale of woes which started from the time she was born in Muzzafarabad in Pakistan. She was 16 when the Partition riots broke out and like lakhs of families, her family too fled their home and lands. On the way to India, their caravan was attacked by Muslim marauders. Outnumbered, one of her brothers fell her down with a sword and left her, assuming her for the dead. She is quick to point out that this was not done out of any illwill but to ensure that she did not befall a fate of shared by hundreds of women and young girls during those dark days.

For four days, she remained unconscious but was mercifully evacuated by a passing Red Cross contingent and sent to a refugee camp. After some time, she met Chet Singh and dreamed of a better future, but misfortune followed her like a shadow.

She married him only to be widowed in a couple of years. Relatives, as per the then prevalent custom, got her married to his brother. He too died 25 years ago. During this time, she had given birth to three sons and two daughters.

Although her daughters are happily married, her dream of seeing her sons married was to remain unfulfilled and this is the saddest part of her life, she sighs, while shaking her head in despair.

The first jolt she received was when her 16-year-old son, Bachan Singh, was diagnosed with the disorder. He just wilted away in my arms when he was 22. Next was the turn of Amarjit Singh who too passed away at the same age. This was simply unbearable for her.

But when her youngest son, Gurbaksh (now 22 years old), too was diagnosed as having the same disorder was too much for her to bear. “It was as if I had been singled out by God for punishment, At an age where he should be leading a carefree life, he cannot even perform simple tasks like eating his food or even shifting from one place to another,” she narrated while throwing a compassionate look at Gurbaksh sitting nearby.

Don’t relatives help out ? She grimaces and says, “Everybody, but for my misfortune, has deserted me.” Perhaps tears too have severed all relations, one wonders at the courage of this frail old woman battling the odds of life.

Today, she has reconciled with the will of the Guru and only prays that she lives long enough to see her only surviving son die. “There is no one to take care of him if I die first,” she remarks matter-of-factly.

She doesn’t want any help since her experience has shown that people only give suggestions. No social organisation has come forward to adopt the ill-fated family so that mother and son can live the last few days of their existence in relative peace and comfort.

Dr R.P. Dhamija, Head, Department of Medicine, says “Nothing can be done to reverse the disorder. Physiotherapy helps to some extent, but that is about it. Although research is being carried out in advanced countries, no breakthrough has been achieved. It is the mother who is the carrier of the virus of the disorder.”